I'll be honest: I've been having a rough time for the past two months or so. Things have come up in my life that I just don't know how to deal with. I've had moments of happiness and peace, but I've also had times where I didn't want to be alive anymore. Times where I thought I was going crazy, and times where I felt completely and utterly alone.
Somehow I'm still here. I know Heavenly Father is keeping me afloat. I would like to say that I have had spiritual experiences during this whole mess and am faithful and trusting in God despite these challenges, but I'm afraid that's not the case. All I can say is that I know God is helping me stay alive. Sometimes it's a blessing, and sometimes I'm not so sure that I want to be kept alive. I'm not trying to be creepy and depressing---I'm not planning anything rash. Some days are just harder than others.
There are good things. Adorable nieces and nephews, having fun at work with awesome co-workers, pouring rainstorms, games and fun with the family, gummy frogs, etc. There are good things.
So that's the update. Ha, I'm afraid it's not too uplifting, but that's my reality right now. It will get better, eventually. I promise my next posts won't be downers.
xoxo, Saralyn
